NEVER MIND THE HYPER BOWL

yo!.. this sporting life... innit!

we're missing our sports..

here in palookaville..

the virus has postponed..

a normal sporting life..

all we have left are..

THE VIRUS GAMES

the season won't end until..

THE HYPER BOWL

you know..

when the bull shit gets so loud..

and so thick..

that even poor teams can win..

NOT FIT TO PLAY

the trouble with these games..

THE CURRENT WORLD SERIES

is that there is no..

level playing field..

for some it is an unequal..

virus load..

some o the virus strain..

is nastier than others..

who gets what is just..

the luck of the draw..

then again..

some o the teams ain't fit..

some of the coaches are crap..

team leaders fail to get the playbook right..

some fail to understand the rules..

but mostly..

the players are past their prime..

or the wrong color..

or too fat..

or just plain knackered..

how can you win these games?

if you start off on the wrong foot..

MONEY ON THE SIDELINES

all bets are off..

the spectators..

are in the bar..

or in the pavillion..

having afternoon tea..

the oil that normally..

lubricates the sport..

has gone down the lavatory..

they can't get..

the big palooka..

off the tele..

they just can't shut him up..

the crowd are gettin restless..

they want the ref. ta shut him up..

or send him off..

time penalties apply..

THE SEARCH IS ON

for the persons who started these games..

the crowd are baying for blood..

but they fail to see..

it was the airplanes wot done it..

yes the virus is a..

nasty little fucker..

but he cain't fly..

without help from above..

WHAT ARE THEIR NAMES

and on what streets do they live..

MEANWHILE

the crowd begins to sing..

a range of traditional..

sportin songs..

the hyper bowl..

would not be the national fixture..

that it is..

without the crowd singalong..

sing a song of sixpence..

a catcher in awry..

four an twenty animals..

baked inna pie..

when a pie was opened..

a virus begin ta sing..

oh what a dainty dish..

ta put before a king..

OH DEAR

oh dear what canna matter be?

the price of oil..

has gone down a lavatory..

we've all gone short..

til after next saturday..

THRILLS AND SPILLS

the score board is signaling..

the end of the first quarter..

the yankees are takin a beating..

but remain in good heart..

the problem for the suits..

is what happens..

once the african and indian games get rolling..

the numbers could be off the charts..

then there is the catering..

the contracts for the food concessions..

have failed to sell..

and now it ain't just the players..

but the crowd also..

that gets ta go hungry..

ONE FOR THE RECORD BOOKS

it looks like we..

goin down ta a wire..

an extra time will..

need ta be played..

the arguing, gouging an shirt pullin..

will go on an on..