YO! ...THREE WISHES DUDE !

genie outa bottle...innit!

PALOOKAVILLE stardate capitulation day+3

peteythesailor : here we sit lak burks inna wilderness...

gobsmacked aint in it......F**K....F**K....F**K....

sunday mornin commin dahn...we low man...we real low...ah knowed it were bad, i knowed sh*t be commin dahn...but i did not know it would get so bad... atta politix wud sell aht a po woikin stiffs wotta still payin taxes...

FINANCIAL NEWS AND SPORT

Large Hardon Collider to be turned off for two months following damage

A faulty connection between two magnets has triggered a meltdown which will delay the world’s biggest economics experiment by two months, the BUST laboratory has admitted...

The fire brigade was called to the Large Currency Collider after the fault, which sent cable soaring by 100 bps in a section of the 17-mile underground circuit on the Swiss-French border.

Last week the CENTRAL BANKER in charge of the collider, BEN "the Atom" BERNANKY, told the Palookaville Sport that he expected to collide the first particles last week, much earlier than thought...

But the breakdown, at 11am UK time on Thursday morning, led to the release of a ton of helium used to cool the magnets that guide subatomic particles around the machines’s circuit. Engineers had to wait for oxygen levels to return to normal before they were able to weigh up the damage.

"When we do wonderful and difficult things at the very edge of our capability we can't expect everything to go smoothly, but this is the price we must pay to make the most profound discoveries about our economy."

previously on HARDON COLLIDER....

QUANTUM ECONOMICS

wow!...innit!....things just gotta whole lot worser...

pickitywhitchtheplonker : it gone quantum man! it jus turn rahn an smile at me an took this freakin great quantum leap...

ninja : “This could be the mother of year-ends. The markets will need extraordinary actions to get through it.” –Brian Sack, Macroeconomic Advisers

“If banks are unwilling to lend to other banks, then they are unwilling to lend to you and me.” –Stan Jonas, Axiom Management Partners

Once a month I update and add to a regular series of posts I call Really Scary Fed Charts.

Although I won’t update the charts until September 15th when the data comes out, I can tell you right now that going forward these charts are about to go from just “really scary”, to “crazy scary”.

bloomberg : Fed Direct Loans Lose Stigma as Banks Push Borrowing to Record

"Commercial banks that a year ago rebuffed a Federal Reserve program to provide cheaper cash may be increasingly dependent on it.

Borrowing from the Fed's discount window hit record levels in six of the past eight weeks, and reached $23.5 billion as of Sept. 10, Fed data show. By comparison, lending averaged just $779 million a week in the three months after New York Fed President Timothy Geithner urged banks to use the program.

The increasing use of the funds risks delaying banks' disposal of nonperforming assets and capital raising....."

spider : WTF? itta HARDON man...

zooneh : they swizz banks gotta huge great HARDON 'celleratin dollas faster n lite...turnin em inta genital warts by collidin em inta each other unnergrahn in europe.

beaulah : they freakin euros man..they not on side...they jus lookin aht fo theysells...while a dolla shrinkin ta wart status they HARDON is goin inta a GREAT DROOP wi alla banks BUST anna SWF'S buyin a place wi BEADS...

'cat : evva one gotta wear condoms nah ta hold dollas...price o rubber bouncin thru da roof....

Peak America

pickardthepeaker : fo get peak oil man! an fo get peak credit! deys jus noise compared ta wotz goin dahn a coz o alla dis 'celleratin...

laverne : wot is he onna bout? he just a poxy painter dude fro PALOOKAVILLE...sit inna loff alla day wi a dog wot half cat, a spider wot talk anna mouse wot look like a rat!

pickardthepolitix : y'all thank i dumb innit? but look arahn an wotta ya see? post superpower DROOP. the very thang wot made yo rich make yo poor!

yo banks is bust anna clevva bastards wot dunnit.. gottit away onner toes wi a BONUS

they particle economics anna quantum leap wot dunnit inna end...nah y'all gonna hafta save up an pay off yo debt or the QUANTUM ECONOMICS wot got yo here is gonna 'flate yo ass off inta da void...

PARTICLE ECONOMICS

yo! strufe, WTF?...

we onna bridge o da united flakes starship TURNERPRIZE as it try get free o da dreaded 'FLATION nebla anna DELEVERAGING black hole...

spider : KINOULTON!...boss!..yo gotta read this message from dorkfleet...guys gotta fix on wot caused alla shit wot goin dahn...

Large Hardon Collider is activated...

pickypainful : say whaaaat? freakin banks bin buildin a 'cellerator unner switzerlan to circulate dollar bills evva faster arahnd in circles an collidin em inna hope o findin higg's BONUS!

zooneh : FORGIVE EM, boss, FO THEY KNOW NOT WHAT THEY DO....

beulah : it da 'flation innit. they bastards caused it wi DISMAL SCIENCE

lavern : nah da BREAD ruined... yeast all chaos-ed up anna bread price risin alla time!

pickardthespacecadet : HARDON got be BIG man!.. ta cause all dis trouble...last thang we need here in space is dollars circulatin at warp speed an crashin inta wallstreet...gon cause a BIG BANG! markets gon implode inta a BLACK HOLE an DEflate a whole world economy into da void...

opkin : ah ben, wot inna fed, gee us iss day, our daily BREAD...

mish : "Before we get to addressing Roubini's blaming of the mess we are in on "free-market laissez-faire" philosophy, let's take a look at calls for Paulson and Bernanke to resign, and one other post on "Socialism For The Rich"...."

ninja : ...."The Treasury committed to invest as much as $200 billion to prevent a collapse of Fannie and Freddie, protecting investors owning more than $5 trillion of their debt and mortgage-backed securities. The U.S. budget deficit will grow next year to $438 billion, the Congressional Budget Office said today, making it harder for President George W. Bush's successor to either cut taxes or increase spending.”

That should make yields start to crawl up and eventually spike. There is a tipping point. Nobody knows where it is, but rest assured, it is out there somewhere."

spider : boss wake up! ...'flation celleratin! -

Barratt warns house price falls acceleratin

'cat : alla 'VESTMENTS srinkin atta faster rate...itta folt o a HARDON ACCELERATOR...

press : Bankers receive death threats over 'end-of-world' experiment

"The bankers behind the world's biggest ever economic experiment have received death threats from critics who claim it could cause the end of the world.

Federals are attempting to recreate the forces that occurred in the immediate aftermath of the GREAT DEPRESSION, which created the universe.

The £5.4 trillion machine at BUST, the BANKERS, USURERS & SUCKERS TRUST based near Geneva, will be switched on this Wednesday .

Some of the HEDGE FUNDS working on the experiment, who include a FAMOUS WHINER and a former SHOE SHINE BOY, have received threatening emails and been besieged by telephone calls from worried members of the public who fear the machine could cause deleveraging and 'flation that will destroy the world."

picklesthegerkin : so ats how it appen! ....greed an hubris builds a HARDON to spin dollas atta speed o lite an itz all gon pear shape! ..nah itZ all hell let loose...chaos warpin allit touches an turnin a DOLLA inta a genital wart!

zooneh : 'KINELL! ...folks gotta wear a condom wen ay buys dollas!

THEY THINK IT'S ALL OVER...

PALLOKAVILLE stardate capitulation day +3

PRESIDENT PAULSON

TIMES : "Despite the lack of detail and absence of any signature on the $1 trillion cheque, Henry Paulson, the US Treasury Secretary, was hailed as a hero by traders on Wall Street yesterday after he managed to erase the worst week on the New York stock markets since the 1929 Crash....

...John McCain, Mr Obama’s Republican rival, however, sought to distance himself from the bailout by claiming that the Treasury’s policy in funding private-sector bailouts should be more consistent and suggested the Federal Reserve may have gone too far in its role in recent rescue operations. Only a year ago, Mr McCain had remarked that he did not know a great deal about economics....
Perhaps seeking to indicate the difference between himself and President Bush, he said that the Treasury “must have well-developed remedies for a financial crisis”.

“With billions of dollars in public money at stake, it will not do to keep making it up as we go along,” he said....

...Carl Icahn, the billionaire shareholder activist who attempted and failed to seize control of Yahoo! this year, described the bailout as crazy and inflationary hell....The Times

mish : The market called Bernanke's Bluff, and came close to a virtual meltdown.. For now, Armageddon was Postponed as Fed Intervenes In Money Markets.

The list of reasons the financial system is unsound grew massively today, by the tune of a $1.2 trillion taxpayer funded bailout designed to bail out the wealthy at the expense of the poor.

Earlier today Paulson has the gall to state "this will cost the tax payer less than the alternative".

No one bothered to ask why it should cost the taxpayer anything at all.

Furthermore, Paulson once again proved he needs simple arithmetic lessons. Shifting losses from those who should bear them (stock and bond holders of failing companies) to the taxpayers is not going to save the taxpayers a dime, rather it is going to cost them plenty, $1.2 trillion plenty as noted in US Taxpayer: A Giant Dumpster For Illiquid Assets.

The Whole Truth And Nothing But The Truth?

Of course not.

Bernanke did not really admit the truth, he only hinted at it. Congress was too dumb to pick it up. The truth is the US financial system is insolvent... mish

peteyasaddo : yo! innit!... it aint ovva...no way! a very fat lady gon sing...

sing aht lahd...sing long an deep an hard...fo a times... ay arrrre a.. channnginnn!

yo say hi I say low..I don know why you say a high...I say a low...a lower low...I don know why you say a-high...I say a-low

THE AVENGERS TAKE OVER..!!!

GREY HOUSE lawn PALOOKAVILLE stardate capitulation day +3

it lookes like the three stooges + someones brother-in-law standing outside the french doors to the greyhouse garden....giving a press conference onna state o a union after the blitz.

DOCTOR DOOM has been attacking the western economy with anti-money created out of nowhere by the one armed bandit atta LAS VEGAS FED... left THERE, as it turns out, fo a apes to find... by none other than DD hissel.

the anti-money has reacted with the ponzi-money in WALL st. to cause a massive deleveraging black hole that is turnig banks inta fallin dominoes and now the three stooges have asked the FANTASTIC FOUR to come to the rescue....

peteyapainter : yo! sh*t innit?...me an beulah here hidin inna shrubbery by the french doors atta greyhouse!
only we can see what the three stooges are wearin unner a stuffed shirts.... it be blue unnerwear...long blue unnerwear wiya 4 inna white coycle onna chests...

the tall, bald one who is meant ta be PRESIDENT paulson is really READ RICHARDS the elastic man... an he be gon stretch hissell arahnd a TOXIC 'vestments an lock em away inna negative zone.

the short, stocky guy wiya squinty eyes is ex-president brush aka the thing an he gone clobber alla investors that sell oat!

the guy next ta im is a WIZARD O OZ .. .aka the human torch an he be gon shout 'flame on' an fly arahnd a place chukkin dough atta folks onna grahnd!

lastly, the brother-in-law gon be a invisible girl an he gon disappear somewhere!

so far the FF have lost every battle to DD an now they look pretty shagged out an lost for what ta do nex...

paulson : look out! DOOM's about!
torchy : FLAME ON...
brush : ITZ CLOBBERIN TIME!
invisible girl : include me out!...

peteypantywaiste : yo! sh*eeeettttt!!! DD is winnin hans dahn anna dominoes is topplin...

AVENGERS ASSEMBLE!

Yaaaayyyyy!!!! alla gang inna countin house gone apesh*t cossa it ovva nah!!! a VENGERS ere an DD gon be whupped bad.

pretty soon alla msn wot shudda know betta is droolin allovva a beers an busted stocks is risin an a sun commin aht...

woz it the sight o CAP an BUCKY, or was it THE SCARLET WITCH? we may nevva know but all ovva a wurl markets is FIXED an a NEW DEAL is... 'vestments can only be INvestments an
go up alla time...alla suckers wot was hopin to invest atta fair price has been SLAPPED SILLY by aVENGERS anna FF...

to be continued.......

GRAVITY POSPONED

he gets inna elevator...hic..hic..but he don't go down..!...INNIT!

game over man! BANDIT ONE...suckers NIL...

msn fulla it today...they so funny...but ay so wrong...per usual...

PANDORA IN REVERSE...INNIT..!

...alla shit guz back inna box...They gon putta dolla collida inta reverse an it create a brown hole...anti-moneh is sucked back outa a system and a grill in place ta stoppa ponzi-moneh from disappearin...

read richards ovva FF gon construc a vacuum dumpster inna negative zone ta clec an hold a hole alphabet soup a crap at woz invented inta reality by a rocket scientists in WALL ST...

the thing gonna clobber alla short sellers anna invisibles girl gon telekinet alla it out inta negative zone!...

THE WATCHER gon looka ovva way wile it all done cos, as he was lookin away while it all be created,...he don wan spoil it nah...

WOBBLYA he gon stan onna bridge o a DORKPRIZE an declare victory fo the USSA.

IT STARTED ON WALL ST.

PREVIOUSLY on capitulation day

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...................................................................

whahoppen? wattat ssahn?

sayin stop! hey..whats that sound? evvabody look whats goin down.....STOP! hey whats that sou...

itta DORKPRIZE innit.... enjin stopped...that the sahnd o silence man!

clouds hang over world stock markets and the ticking grows ever louder in the still silence...the countdown has begun and soon the alien HEDGE FUNDS will, in unison, start to attack the last surviving banks and financial stocks....

in NEW YORK the aliens are eatin skyscrapers an wall st. will nevva look a same agin....

DAY 2......PRESIDENT paulson has taken command of the United Flakes Dorkship... Turnerprize.... joined forces with the OLD EMPIRES and fired off a simultaneous $multi-billion mega liquidty torpedo.

President Paulson has also put out halucinogenic NEW IDEAS to thwart and destroy the alien HEDGE FUNDS before their relentless short attacks can liquidate WALL ST.

SUCKERS RALLY?

Markets have rallied by A LOT! on news of the emasculation of the SHORT SELLERS who have been stuck together by a Lepage glue gun fired from the Turnerprize by theWATCHER'S men.

The large bald dude inna toga takes action at last! the market, FIXED IN TIME FOR THE ELECTION, has FORGOTTEN the alleged recession and the fact that the workin stiffs is skint!

It is as if THE WIZARD OF OZ has waved his wand and all is now perfect inna perfec world!

WAIT A MO...WATSISS?

bazza's pal : " The bear raids on the banks and brokers were NOT a case of piling on by US based hedge funds. And from what he was seeing and hearing about in terms of order flow, the vast majority of the financial short selling the past week or so were being done overseas. It appears that the lion's share of shorting was coming out of overseas bourses such as London and Dubai.It may not be a coincidence that the financial short selling ban is both here and in London...

...Then there is another coincidence: The huge increase in shorting of the financials occurred on the anniversary of 9/11. And on top of that, the same institutions attacked on 9/11/01 were the ones suffering in recent days."

onna nother note...

bazza...The grand irony of all this is that Naked Shorting has been very profitable for the big broker dealers, like Morgan And Goldman and Merrill and Lehman. They have looked the other way for years, and the SEC has been AWOL on this issue.

Short sales require a locate (shares to borrow) and then a subsequent delivery. It should take less than 3 days to deliver the borrowed shares, but instead, delivery is often delayed indefinitely. Failure to deliver leads to a margin charge, which can be as high as 9-15%.

If you want to know who to blame for the past 5 years of naked shorting, you only have two places to look: The Financial brokers themselves, and the non-feasance of a feckless SEC." The Big Picture

to be continued...

ROCKIN ALL OVER THE WORLD

ninja : "Wow. Just amazing. The futures popped early in the morning on the news… then started drifting down again. While still positive, the futures look and feel limp.

Basically this action is like taking the defibrillator to a patient and just ‘giving her’… and declaring that this will ‘heal’ the twitching patient… Unfortunately the patient is long dead, and the twitching will stop when the current from the defibrillator stops.

You can’t bring back the dead with a defibrillator. You can’t bring back dead banks with more liquidity. We are heading for Japan v2.0.

Think ZERO percent interest rates and think DEFLATION. Think LOST DECADE. Think DEPRESSION. Now make all that GLOBAL.

That is what we have to look forward to." the financial ninja

peteysan : Turning japanese!..turning japanese!..yes i think so....

mish :Proactive Stupidity....China, Russia Intervene In Equity Markets

peteyski : BACK INNA USSR

bloomberg : ``It is likely that we will see a much heavier regulatory hand that, in the end, is going to saddle lots of companies with unnecessary costs and damage our market system,'' said Poole, a Bloomberg News contributor.

Foreigners' appetite for investing in the U.S. may also be tempered by the impact of the crisis on the economy. Allen Sinai, chief economist at Decision Economics in New York, said the U.S. is in for an extended recession as the financial- services industry -- a major source of increased productivity growth in the past -- consolidates.

``The federal government assumes that it can borrow whatever it wants from foreign lenders at low interest rates for as long as it wants,'' said David Walker, former comptroller of the U.S. Government Accountability Office who's now head of the Peter G. Peterson Foundation in New York. ``That's an imprudent assumption.''

peteyville : PEAK AMERICA innit,,,

THE FUGITIVE 2

it wernt me wot dunnit...they woz iss one armed bandit wi a lever wi a nob onnit.....the bastard been creatin dollas fo years outa nowhere and wi out noticin it...anti-dollas woz created inna equal amahnts.

yo! sh*t itta fan!..innit. PRESIDENT paulson has had to get help from a rest o a wurld

ta fight offa da hedgies an save democracy an apple pie....

Bloomberg : "The action is the latest attempt by central bankers to coordinate their response to the financial crisis. In December, they joined forces to boost dollar liquidity around the world after interest-rate reductions in the U.S., the U.K. and Canada failed to ease concerns about bank lending.

Failure to ease markets will see central banks inject even more cash, said Robert Barrie, an economist at Credit Suisse Group in London. Other options central banks could take include accepting greater collateral denominated in foreign currencies and increasing lending to banks abroad.

``The lack of dollars has been making the financial crisis worse around the world, which is why we now have this coordinated response,'' Barrie said."

CAPITULATION DAY

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...................................................................

whahoppen? wattat ssahn?

sayin stop! hey..whats that sound? evvabody look whats goin down.....STOP! hey whats that sou...

itta DORKPRIZE innit.... enjin stopped...that the sahnd o silence man!

clouds hang over world stock markets and the ticking grows ever louder in the still silence...the countdown has begun and soon the alien HEDGE FUNDS will, in unison, start to attack the last surviving banks and financial stocks....

in NEW YORK the aliens are eatin skyscrapers an wall st. will nevva look a same agin....

THE FUGITIVE....

yo! cop fo dis... da FED is outa ammo!!!

yves :Update 11:30 AM: "FT Alphaville, putting none too fine a point on it, calls its post "The Fed’s run out of money," and provided the text of the Treasury's press release. This bit caught my eye:

The Treasury Department announced today the initiation of a temporary Supplementary Financing Program at the request of the Federal Reserve. The program will consist of a series of Treasury bills, apart from Treasury’s current borrowing program, which will provide cash for use in the Federal Reserve initiatives.

"Temporary". If you believe that, I have a bridge I'd like to sell you....

In all seriousness, just like the Term Auction Facility and the other supposedly temporary special facilities, it will be very hard to wean the financial system off central bank support."
naked capitalism

peteybethyname : itta alla faulta yo one arm bandit atta FED creatin alla anti-money while lisnin ta Also Sprak Zarathrustra onna ipod nano... anti-money an pozi-money be created equal but opposit...so...DEBT IS CANCELLING OUT CAPITAL...
itta bust... an planes is grahnded allovva a wurld.

I heard tell o how a WIZARD O OZ can stop a DEflation wi a INflation...folk say...
itta lotta fun...but not as good as gold!

BACK INNA USSR...

yo! gudonya comrade...particle roubles next innit?

bazza : "The criminal enterprise, formerly known as Russia, has decided to halt trading. With its stock market down 57%, Putin & Co. are being even more risk averse than Paulson, Bernanke, et.al. & Co." thebigpicture

ninja : ..."These events will absolutely crater the Russian economy. I’m talking about the REAL economy here. Entire enterprises will get destroyed in this liquidity crunch, idling both machines and labor. This won’t become evident for months. But the damage has been done. Believe it."

bazza :.."Here in the US, we may be well meaning interventionists Socialists -- but at least our markets are open !"

previously on PALOOKAVILLE : financial news and sport

CATCH 22...INNIT

wheeeeuwwww! innit!....thought that AIG gon fall on us...f**k us up real bad....

jeff : "Vast holes are opening up in the foundations of banks and other commercial lenders, as violent tremors that began on Wall Street arrive in London, Tokyo and elsewhere. As the weakest edifices collapse, the damage is made worse by Hurricane Dodgy Debt that's ripping through the credibility of many well-established houses."

Fantasy finance cuts many of the giants of global banking down to size

jeff : "As for the culprits, it's going to be fascinating to see what becomes of them. How many of the "mad scientists", the financial engineers who designed and built the machinery that promised to convert toxic waste into balance-sheet bullion, will stay in work?...

..."Great news. We can lend fortunes to people who have no hope of repaying. Better still, it doesn't matter if the collateral is worth less than the loan. From this, we'll become millionaires."...

...How much, I wonder, did the so-called Big Four accountancy firms get paid by the banking industry to make all those sub-prime assets seem like they had value?..." Telegraph

web : "Even more despicable than the Orvieto deal is Milo’s arrangement with the Germans to bomb his own squadron when the syndicate’s cash flow runs low, due to excessive investment in Egyptian cotton."

milo minderbender : we made us a profit and we got us a BONUS so WTF?

THE LETTER : INFLATION VERSION

Letter Rule

Under the terms of the Bank of England's mandate, King is obliged to write a letter of explanation to Darling if inflation breaches its 2 percent target by more than one percentage point. He must write another one if the rate exceeds that level for a further three months.

``Inflation is likely to remain markedly above the target until well into 2009,'' King wrote in a letter to Chancellor of the Exchequer Alistair Darling today. ``I continue to expect, therefore, that I will be writing further open letters to you over the next year.'' Bloomberg

PETEY SEZ...
....gimme a ticket fo a fast train i still a waitin fo a airplane...lonely days a goin, amma comin hooome, my banker... just wrote me a letter...

ohhhh he wrote me a letter sayin he can't afford to live... wi out more moneh no mo,
said he wuz sorry fo makin us po

i don care how much moneh i gotta spend, bank gotta git back ta lendin agin..
inflation an intrest rates is high, i aint gonna lie, my banker wrote me a letter.....

da dum daa da dada...DA DUM DA DA DADA...

A LOWER LOW..! WOT 'AVE WE 'ERE THEN?

look out! here comes chisum....

petey : constanoon affable! how goes the 'nick investors club'?

affable : a right pallava...i should coco. me plates is killin me an the apples is too steep ta climb...

MEAN WHILE...BACK ONNA STREET....

the wheels have come off the dolla collider and it deleveragin the whole economy! word is THEY AINT NO MONEY!

...the anti-money created by the dollar collider atta FED is cancelling out all the ponzi-money printed by the one armed bandit fruit machine.

here at the end of moral hazard markets are revisiting the lows of a few months ago...but itz only a visit...from there they go on to even lower lows...

I don know why you say goodbye!..I say A LOW...a lower low....I don know why you say goodbye!..I say a low...

SYSTEMIC TOXIC DEBT BUST SYSTEMIC TOXIC...

tikkertape runnin....

i been watchin NOURIEL ROUBINI who be da man onna BUST....

peterthepainter : grizzlybear a bottom right?

nouriel : no! the entire financial system is facing DISASTER and it's going to get worse.

peterthepainter : yeh but phony an fraudy, lemmin an merrilmerge an ?AIG? be da end right?

nouriel : no! all the broker dealers will go.

peterthepainter : notta morgstan tho, not goldysack, no way man!

nouriel : yes! they may have to merge. their(the broker/dealers) entire business model is fundamentally flawed at this point!

peterthepainter : so it not jus sub-prime en?

nouriel : no! it's sub-prime, prime, home equity, credit card, auto loans, student loans, leverage loans, muni bonds.....

peterthepainter : IT THE DEBT STUPID! innit! (no not you man!)

nouriel : If Lehman collapses expect a run on all of the other broker dealers and the collapse of the shadow banking system


to be continued....

THEY WERE ONLY PLAYING DOMINOES

EXTRA : BAILOUT LATEST -

EX WIZARD GIVES THUMBS ?DOWN?

greenspan :``What they are trying to do with Lehman is find a way in which there is no government money involved in this particular set of negotiations,'' Greenspan said. ``If they can't, they have to make a very key decision as to whether they allow it to liquidate or support it,'' he said, adding that he doesn't know enough details to recommend the right move.... Bloomberg

Barclays walks away from deal to rescue Lehman Brothers

...Telegraph : "Barclays, whose negotiating team is led by Barclays Capital chief Bob Diamond, is in the process of informing Lehman and the Federal Reserve Bank of New York that it no longer wants to take part in the discussions because of the US government's unwillingness to guarantee Lehman's assets.

EARLIER TODAY:-
Treasury begs banks to rescue Lehman

"Barclays is considering a direct plea from Hank Paulson, the US Treasury Secretary, to assemble a cut-price rescue bid for Lehman Brothers, the investment bank which has become the latest victim of the global financial crisis." ...Sunday Times

Scramble to save Wall Street

"Three of Wall Street's best-known institutions were huddled behind locked doors this weekend in frantic talks with US authorities and bankers to either sell their businesses or put together rescue packages...." Independent

PALOOKAVILLE NEWS stardate whatever+38

"PRESIDENT HANK BRUSH hopes to beat the banks at DOMINOES...you know, the game where one dominoe collapses and topples the next and so on until all the banks are bust...

HANK, though is winning the game hands down as he buys them up or gets a black hole bank to swallow them.

ANTI-MONEY has been canceling out all the PONZI-MONEY ever since the DOLLAR COLLIDER caused a DELEVERAGING BLACK HOLE that has sucked liquidity out of the ecomomy and caused an alleged RECESSION.

HANK, president of the FORMALLY CAPITALIST America, has almost single handedly doubled the national debt in order to NATIONALISE financial institutions.

the hope is that this will prop up the markets and sweep the alleged recession under the
GREY HOUSE carpet until after the election.

neither candidate for the PRESIDENCY has noticed the alleged recession or the GAME OF DOMINOES and therefore has not felt the need to address any of these issues.

...meanwhile everyone is carrying on as normal except for those who have lost their home or their job or their investments...

CHAOS AT THE FED

time is spinnin out of control and things is happenin out of order....

2001 - A Space Oddity....

.....a bunch a bankers is sittin arahn a dyin camp fire inna desert...each ape dreams of a bigger BONUS. they are hungry and cold and live in fear of some other ape gettin a bigger house than them....

alla a sudden the band starts playin Also Sprak Zarathrustra anna sky guz dark....WWWHAMM...when the apes look up they find that the bank has gone and in itz place stands a..... fruit machine....
wots that?
itta bandit man!
say what? wot kind bandit got spinnin wheels anna lever wi a nob onnit?
itta one armed bandit man...its fo CREATIN money..
how come it be where a banks sposed ta be?
WTF? who cares man! jus pull onna lever an spin some dollas outa it..shit fo brains...duhhh...

the Apes of God giz the lever a tug anna wheels begin ta spin...then they speed up...collidin real dollas inta particle dollas and printin em out by a billion...

sheeeeit man itsa best evva fang wot i seen! one mo theys jus a ordinary bank and then a big bang anna money is CREATED outa nowhere!!

ITZ THE BONUS INNIT!

the bankers is apeshit onna news abaht the new way o creatin money...anotha day anotha billion...pretty soon evva thang bubble up an alla apes get rich....UNTIL...

one day planes start flyin inta skyscrapers anna shit hits a fan...dude atta FED (thats where they keeps the one armed bandit) he gets a robot ta woik the handle day an nite untill noboddy notice anything is wrong any mo...

seven years later aint no planes flyin at all an folks is WAITIN ALL OVVA A WORLD fo planes that don't come ...cossa the DROOP!

whatta droop man? wot fo we gotta have a DROOP?
DROOP gon be big man!..big as a BOOM..
what boom dude? all we did woz pull onna lever...ya know leverage up an buy evva fang in site!
yeah well...ah sure got some bad noos fo yo dude....

ANTI-MONEY

say woy? WTF is dis anti-money man?
well it lak dis dude...yo apes wotz runnin a bank has been pullin onna lever too much and it turns out that fo every dolla wot theys created ta spend...anuvva (ANTI-DOLLA) was created as debt!

MONEY IS DEBT

yo fulla shit man...get em planes flyin agin man... fo i kick yo ass!
aint gonna do nuthin fo yo no mo!! yo f**ked up man...yo deep inna debt DROOP anna bandit wiya one lever anna knob is creatin ANTI-DOLLAS wots eatin up a PONZI-dollas wot yo made wi yo machine...

Meanwhile... back at the.. LAS VEGUS FED

president brush calls in the WIZARD OF OZ to answer some tough questions...

dubbya : nah, ben, me anna boys want ya ta know that nonna this gon be gettin aht til affa the 'lection!

ben : sure boss! anything yo say.

dubbya :wotcha got planned fo ta stop this DELEVERAGIN BLACK HOLE from swallerin up the world economy?

ben : sure boss! anything yo say.

dubbya : how much ammo yo got leff atta FED ta prop uppa bankin system?

ben : sure boss! no problem man.

dubbya : how long before the HARDON is back?

ben : sure boss! anything yo say.

dubbya : what is the next step inna plan ta end da DROOP?

ben : what DROOP? i see no DROOP!

dubbya : Droop be wot we has affa da HARDON clapse...folks skint anall..houses empty...planes grahnded...SUV's onna lot...troops got no bullits!

ben : sure boss! sure...by the way boss...do you actually have any proof of this DROOP?

WEEKEND A LONG TIME INNA NEBLA

Weekend could be a long time in finance

John : This column is called the Long View. It is meant to have a long time horizon and to have a broad scope. That is a problem.

This column is being written, in New York, on Friday morning. As far as many traders across the world are concerned, a "long view" at the moment is anything that goes much past Sunday evening...They appear to believe that it is safe now not to provide government money for whoever buys Lehman, and that the market can survive without it.....

.........This would entail a bet that the worst scenarios of a systemic meltdown have been averted. Wall Street and the rest of the world would instead have to take the consequences, which will probably be a few years of much slower economic growth than had been hoped, and some truly horrible times for those who work in the financial services industry.

Much therefore depends on exactly what is decided over the weekend and how the market responds next week. The "long view" could change a lot in the next few days."... FT

pickardthe painter : nah back in PALOOKAVILLE

Large Hardon Collider: Why we're all in love with the 'God particle' machine

"The Large Hardon Collider (LHC) is the biggest and most expensive BUST ever built, and the bankers are not going to put it into top gear for some time. Indeed, the first real experiments are unlikely to happen for weeks, if not months.

When the economists do finally turn all the knobs to max and allow two beams of sub-atomic currencies to collide head on, they might still generate a black hole that could end the economy, but the odds are millions to one against. You are much more likely to win the lottery.

Why has the LHC switch-on generated such massive interest? Is it just that frisson of about the possible fear of the end of the world? Perhaps it's more that Radio PALOOKA chose to devote a whole day to it - indeed, Big Bang Day spread over a week, for some reason best known to the DJ.

But there have been energetic rumblings elsewhere, too, and the sheer excitement of the scientists at BUST (the BANKERS, USURERS and SUCKERS TRUST based in Geneva) seems to have penetrated the consciousness of millions of ordinary people who had never heard of a RECESSION until this week.

So what is the allure of investment banking? Partly it is simply a question of human curiosity, and that starts young. In PALOOKAVILLE, a week before Big Bang Day, I gave a talk about the history of boom and bust as part of the Palookaville Association's Festival of Investment...."

Will the switch-on of the LHC reawaken a public passion for saving? I hope so. It has been built to look for answers to some of the deepest questions that occur to us. Where did the money come from? Why is it here? Will it last? Every one of us wants to know the answers.

Shortly after the LHC switch-on, I was interviewed on Radio Palookaville. A reporter in Airstrip 1 asked a schoolgirl why she was so excited by it. She said that in 20 years' time people would still be talking about the BUST, and she was here, now, witnessing the start of its journey.

Let's hope she's not right and that, enthused by this week's flirtation with the BAILOUT, the public will stay in love with big GOVERNMENT...."

pickardywhich : some folks nevva appy man!....

Hackers attack Large Hardon Collider

"Hackers have mounted an attack on the Large HARDON Collider, raising concerns about the security of the biggest experiment in the world as it passes an important new milestone.

The POLITICIONS behind the £5.8bn BAILOUT had already received threatening emails and been besieged by telephone calls from worried members of the public concerned by speculation that the machine could trigger a black hole to swallow the economy, or earthquakes and tsunamis, despite endless reassurances to the contrary from the likes of Prof. ben bernanke....

....Bankers working at BUST, the organisation that runs the vast smasher, were worried about what the hackers could do because they were "one step away" from the computer control system of one of the huge detectors of the machine, a vast magnet that weighs 12,500 tons, measuring around 21 metres in length and 15 metres wide/high.....

....The BUST team of around 2,000 bankers is racing with another team that runs the 'flation detector, also at BUST, to find the CRUNCH particle, the one that is responsible for misselling....

....BUST relies on a 'defence-in-depth' strategy, separating control networks and using firewalls and complex passwords, to protect its control systems from malicious software, such as denial-of-DROOP attacks, botnets and zombie machines, which can strike with a synchronised attack from hundreds of QUANTUM machines around the world....

Large Hardon Collider: Scientists launch competition for a funkier name

The Large Hardon Collider may do exactly what it says on the tin but, in an unusual move, bankers have asked members of the public to come up with a catchier name.

The members of BUST - perhaps motivated by a little professional jealousy at the media attention given to the investment experiment - has launched a competition to find a new moniker for the dollar smashing machine buried beneath Geneva.

Dr Richard Pike, its chief executive, has said that the name "fails to reflect the drama of its mission, or the inspiration it should be conveying to the wider public".

The organisation has launched a competition, with a $500 prize, to find what it considers to be "the best alternative name ... which most effectively captures the imagination of both young and old, whether interested in economics, or merely sceptical onlookers."

The LHC is the world's largest and most powerful dollar accelerator.

Its function is to get different currencies whizzing in different directions around the 17-mile long circuit at the speed of light, to make them collide head-on.

Results obtained from tests should, theorize the scientists, help to answer some of the most fundamental questions about the nature of the world economy.

While most people without a working knowledge of sub-atomic economics have struggled with what it actually does, a large proportion have also had problems with the basic spelling of Large Hardon Collider.

Web users have had particular trouble with the unfamiliar "hardon" - the collective name for the particles used in the experiments.

Their misspellings have given rise to a range of alternative websites [warning: explicit content] that have nothing to do with the multi-billion pound device or the search for the so-called 'God particle', the elusive Higgs BONUS.

I AM THE URBAN SPACEMAN

yo! suckers...it the weeken dahn heh in PALOOKAVILLE an it dull man! noboddy postin nuthin onna web cos they all chillin aht wivva fammly... president BRUSH call up an kick my ass abaht the piece on PEAK AMERICA sayin i suck an my blog issa worst blog onna planet an my stuff stink an all...

HARDON collider startin to spin euros nah...probly gonna shrink em somewot...i guess al look inta it some an see iffn it worth doin a peece on... wetha they gon reach wart speed though is anyones gess!

beulah aht atta beauty parlor anna 'cat aht inna yard, US retail sales fell agin, lemming bros. gone dahna toilet agin so footsie went up???

gon lissen ta cream fo a bit



thats better nah innit....

me i always thought the lyric guy PETE BROWN shudda gotta bigga mention.i know of no better poetry in rock!

Pete Brown Feels Cream

HOW THE LOSS WENT WEST

Wot'cha

out here in space no one can here you scream....innit!....

pickardthewatcher : one day when we woz trekkin cross space inna TURNERPRIZE we come cross dis really large dude onna planet alla his own. i sez ta im - yo!.. large dude inna toga!...whahappnin dahn iss way, man?

watcher : yo painterdude...know you not that i am the WATCHER?

picky : wot fro the comic book?

watchy : one anna same boy....i out here watchin alla comets an stuff smack inta worlds and F**k em up bad...an i caint do nuthin ta stop it.

picky : yeah i read abaht it wen ah wuz a kid....it mus be tuff bein like, omnipotent, an all an not be allowed ta stop stuff appnin.

watchy : sho is tuff man! an it don't get no easier wi time... yo see, it a punishment metered out ta us watchers by a po folks, ya know...workin stiffs an such, fo not stoppin they clevva bastards wot bust a banks back when.

pickiticity : shucks dude, am real sorry fo ya, stuck aht ere onna own wi no gum ta chaw...BUT that said.....

....THATS HOW A WEST WUZ LOSS...GREED AN HUBRIS AN SWIZZ AN BEZZLE an it wan no po workin stiffs wot dunnit...it was all em CLEVVA BASTARDS fromma IVY LEAGUES innit.....GOOD OLE BOYS...ole skool tie, good at sports, gotta steely dan T-shirts.....they inna BANKS anna LAW anna POLITIX wot shudda know betta!

"yo!.. workin stiff!...get dis - yo kin buy dis ouse fo paper promises an it will make yo rich...as it go up in price...yo can cash in an BUY STUFF from overseas AND IF IT GO DAHN in price...(WHICH IS IMPOSSIBLE)...yo can WALK AWAY and (wait fo it) NOT HAVE TO PAY US BACK!!!"

WHO THOUGHT O THAT??? WHAT freakin GENIUS dreamed that up?...and where was a WATCHER? he asleep atta wheel man...big time!

badpickardperson : sorry man! ah shuddna seddit!.. ah know! ..but ah feels better fo sayin it...dude shuddna bottle thangs up...aint that the truth man..aint that the truth!

BACK IN THE USSA

awwrigghhttt! nah yo torkin...we all markit fixers afterall...

Russia may use wealth fund to support markets

"Russia is considering using money from its national wealth fund and pension fund to support financial markets where necessary in the future, Alexei Kudrin, finance minister said on Thursday as the country’s stock market inched higher following moves to bolster confidence.....

Mr Kudrin’s comments were an apparent volteface as he has previously strongly opposed investing the national wealth fund in the country’s financial markets on the grounds that such a move would be inflationary and market distorting.".....FT

pickitypaint : an i thought it jus ah side wot don it...

spider : they aint no sides no mo boss... wall come dahn an all, man...KGB retired to DUBAI innit!

'cat : where do they get em fro man?...someboddy wake im up...

HOW THE WEST WAS LOST

SSSSSHHHHHHHH....sotto voce man innit! big secret day. don let a wurld catch yo cryin.....

pickardthepumkin : don tell no one, don tell noboddy... we all jus bin onna nuvva 'ship.....all a sudden they woz a pingin and we was beamed up.....

Enter... The Klangon

wort : how do you do chaps? my colleagues and I would like to welcome you aboard the klangon warbird SSSHITKIKKER.

pickardy : say wot? wassorta shit is dis? ah don unnerstan a woyd e sayin man!

'cat : it a alien tong boss! yo gotta toyn on a intastella translata.

pickerty : dang blasted nebla! F**kin disrupted me name tag anna translata pingin an all....WHACK!...

wort : we brung yo cross space an outa the sh*t fo a moments o calm and reflection...to see ifn yo can git a handle on wots goin down wi da nebla anna deleveragin black ole...

picardicity : that berrer!.. ah kin git yo gist nah, man..

wort : us klangons usta be on two diffrent shows! we wus mindin us own bizniss wen long comma swizz bank an 'celerated us moneh inna HARDON machine... dough goin rahn fasta an fasta ...collidin inta BIG BANGS an stuff. noboddy new were they woz or who they woz no mo...
...ONE MINUTE I WAS A LITTLE PINK NITTED DUDE onna blue planet...an a next i woz iss ugly, fierce guy wi a deep tan, anna back- bone onna fore hed.

spider : itta SWIZZ innit!

'cat : so yo think yo kin help us outa they shit wot weez in?

wort : ah commin ta it man..don rush me...

pickardthetuffguy : wotta ya got sucker..tork fast or sling it man..we got stuff ta do an we outa here...

wort : sheesh enuff already..we gotta message fo ya from admiral ROUBINI of dorkfleet...

spider : itta PAUL..he got it on screen


zooneh : wow that admiral roubini he CAPPIN O DA SHIP man! po ole jim he look IN SHOCK.

pickardthe painter : so wot e sayin en? sahn lak im say we F**KED man...NEW WURL ODOUR innit! alla movies inna forrin tong anna merican gel wot wants ta be inna movies gotta wear fruit baskit onner ed.

beulah : say wot? no freakin way man! I aint gonna wear no baskit o fruit onna ed....

zooneh : alla movies gon be breakin inta song n dance ever few minnits. curvey soyds an saris instedda good ole guns an sex an stuff.....

opkin : y'all shudda stayed in bed man. yo nebla gon kick yo ass inta a future where yo gon be in debt ta all yo enemies an they gon laff they bollocks off at yo....yo banks is bust cos they 'cellerated they dollas inta evva smaller particles an mixed em up inna alphabet soup o sh*t....they spread em aroun a wurl an foul up a whole shootin match.....

to be continued....

TURNING JAPANESE, TURNING JAPANESE.. yes I think so...

yo! dorktrekkers! nebla spinnin evva fasta, ever darker. chaos warpin evva fang inta sommat else.

pickardthepanicker : whahoppen musky?

departy dawg : owwww! ma toebone ***!*$

mish : "Hmm. Interesting that this was such a unanimous declaration. I wonder when the bulk of those CDS contracts were initiated. Could it by any chance be March or July of 2008? And who was on the other side?

Imagine betting on a default, getting it, and losing your ass. It seems to me that is what happened.

Who Lost?

• Taxpayers
• Small Banks holding F&F preferreds
• Investors holding F&F common or preferreds

Who Won?
Thirteen "major" dealers of credit-default swaps.

• PIMCO

Is this a great system or what?"

ken : "A year into the global financial crisis, several key central banks remain extraordinarily exposed to their countries' shaky private financial sectors. So far, the strategy of maintaining banking systems on feeding tubes of taxpayer-guaranteed short-term credit has made sense. But eventually central banks must pull the plug. Otherwise they will end up in intensive care themselves as credit losses overwhelm their balance sheets."

pickypanicky : sheeeeit! it all acommin apart atta seams! damn freakin leverage wot donnit. hedge funds an shit... nowa banks is bust anna feds is outa ammo....

zooneh : look east young painter dude...theys answers inna risin sun. they shit went belly up in '90 an they still pickin it outa they teeth today.

'cat : shit gon be a big deflate jus lak japan...workin stiffs livvin inna box inna park wi no gum ta chaw. politix an banks in denial an holdin on fo evva to dud stuff onna books.

laverne : zombies man!... 'night o a livvin ded' ded corporates gettin up outa a grahn an com getcha in yo beds an suck yo freakin brains out!

piccypanny : ohhhhhh maaahhh gaaawwwd..... i be changin shape an mah dangly bits gon shrunk ta the size o dodgy clateral....

previously on dorktrek : lost in space....

DESOLATION ROW

yo! sheeeeeeit! innit!...

stardate whatever +30 PALOOKAVILLE

pickardthepainter : i member when john MAJOR finally convinced john THATCHER that britain should join yo ERM (THATCHER think it allow her to cut interest rates!) yo stock market spiked up big time the next day. affer that it fell and thangs went from bad to woise.

today after yo BAILOUT yo markets is spiking up big time agin and it will all end badly AGIN.

spider : yo gotta see this boss, dude here gotta fix onna shit wot goin down...

karl :

ANOTHER TEQUILA SUNRISE

yo suckers! eeeeeasyehhhh lak sunday mornin yeh? PALOOKAVILLE asleep at a wheel! ... is yo is or is yo aint onna nest man? ...haw haw , yo gettin screwed anyway!!!!

zooneh : coupla pieces heh bout the bailout...

tim : ..."As an American, this saddens me. It saddens me to see the government of our country turn its back on true capitalism and whore the nation's treasury for the sake of their friends. This is not how a free market behaves. Free markets - - true free markets - - are natural, healthy, and self-cleansing. Sometimes the cleansing process is painful. But what Hank Paulson and Ben Bernanke are doing is destroying the country's future for the short-term benefit of ingratiating themselves to their small body of constituents.

Having said that, as a bear, I couldn't be happier with this news. As readers here know, last week was sensational for me. But I got out of my index puts since I felt they had done their duty, and I wanted to see indexes fight their way back to their failure levels before re-entering those positions. But what would create such an opportunity? What new reason would the bulls be given to buy? Well, my friends, the reason is here. Straight from God in heaven above. Another bailout. Another white horse." slope of hope

mish : ...."The only question is how badly this will blow up. Government bailouts are never confidence inspiring regardless of whatever short term reaction we may see on Monday."

MARKET TIMING

yo! it me zooneh. alla crew gon sleep ceppin me. i gits ta wach a fireworks up heh onna bridge wiout em suckers whinin on an stuff.

FUNNY init! ever time a market starts fallin fast, some clevva cloggs inna US sticks a great big freakin BANDAID onnit.

...in january it was a huge cut in interest rates by a fed!

...in march it wasa bailout o grizzly stearns!

...in july it was ..."Remarks from U.S. Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson (who indicated today that the Feds’ current mission was to support the financers as they are presently structured) seemed to rule out an imminent government takeover."

...in september itz GSE bailouts... done deal!

market gotta be propped up man...'lection commin!

well gravity a bitch man! 'chute gonna slow er down some but she don give up man! she gon getcha! ...fact is yo skint innit?

dudes fromma desert gon buy up yo stuff wi beads man.... but jus not yet..... wait fo it,..wait fo...

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

Yo! innit! ......thats the sound o the man workin onna chainnnn gainnnnngggggg......

zooney : o no it aint dude! itta sound o the TURNERPRIZE as it hangs above the nebla watchin it do stuff ta alla suckers wotz still inna market.

halfcat : volume gone up an stocks guz dahn, innit. whadda ya say zoon?

zoon : yo! 'cat man. looks lke it jus yo an me heh now ta obsoive da workin o the neb. seems lak jus yesday that alla news woz good anna night sky shine like dymons. now alla noos is bad....alla leevs is brahnnnn.... anna skyyy be greyyyyyy........

'cat : yeh yeh so what? wotta foocha man? that wot alla cats wanna know...

zoon : allin good time youth, furst lets lookit somma the stuff folks sayin abaht that bill whotsit from yesdays piece....

mish : ... Gross desperately needs to read a book on Austrian economics. One does not cure problems by throwing money at them. The housing boom, the commercial real estate boom, and the shopping center economic model are all malinvestments that resulted from the misallocation of capital....

By asking for bailout of "mom and pop", Bill Gross appears to be asking for a bailout of Pimco.

yves : ...."The US simply does not have the resources to perform a rescue operation on the scale Gross envisions. If we were to attempt it, the amount of borrowing required would push Treasury yields up, undermining (more likely, more than completely reversing) whatever benefit there was from spread reduction. We've already seen a some interventions not producing some of the expected benefits. The Fed had clearly hoped that its pushing down of the short end of the yield curve would provide some relief to fixed mortgage rates. Instead, they've gone up...."

'cat : yeh, yeh, so now wots appnin?

ninja : ...."On the daily chart prices broke out of the Bear Wedge, and drifted sideways after finding support around the 1265 area. We can now safely say, prices have broken DOWN and OUT.

This move should take prices to the lows around 1200 before even attempting a bounce. Most likely, momentum will carry prices right through the lows…

Non-farm payrolls could make or break this move. I’m thinking make… say good bye to the ‘12’ handle and go introduce yourself to the '11's...."

baz : ..."One last data point worth noting: As the chart below shows, when employment data goes negative on a year over year basis, we get a recession 100% of the time:

>

Non Farm Payrolls, Year over Year changes (1935-2008)

chart courtesy of Merrill Lynch

>And as that chart shows,we are still in the early stages of any employment downturn, as employment is a lagging indicator. Hence, hopes that the non-recession is all but over are most likely very premature.

Will today be the month when NFP crosses the 6 figure line? It certainly can be argued that but for the Birth Death adjustment, it already has. Given that layoffs are now at the highest levels since 2002, a 100k number is very possible. But any negative number will tip us into the red Y/Y -- with all the negatives associated with that." the big picture

ALCHEMY BE THY NAME !!

PALOOKAVILLE stardate whatever+26

pickardthepainter : (whistling) i wus feelin inseekyourrr, ya mite not lurv me anymourrr.....
allus wanted ta be ferry man!!!

laverne : it woz lennon wot wrote it yo divot!

spider : yo! crooner dude! do yo fink da banks is bust?

from bloomberg

Fed, ECB Must Unplug Markets From Life Support: Mark Gilbert

``The collateral that we take must also be traded in the market because only then is it priced accurately,'' Weber said. ``We certainly won't tolerate the creation of collateral for central banks only, without the intention of trading them.''

Almost Alchemy

You will struggle, though, to find anyone who doesn't believe that is exactly what banks have done, bundling together risky consumer loans into asset-backed securities specifically to pledge them to the ECB rather than trade them on the market.

``We estimate at least 20 percent of all eligible collateral fails that test and a disproportionate amount of such non- tradable collateral is currently being pledged for liquidity operations at the ECB,'' Meyrick Chapman, a strategist at UBS in London, wrote in a research note this week.

ECB council member Yves Mersh said on Aug. 23 that ``at the margins, there can still be cases where you see dangers of gaming the system.'' The central bank has agreed that the rules need a ``certain amount'' of refinement, he said.

Those changes may include bigger discounts between what the face value of a security is and how much can be borrowed against it, a demand for higher credit ratings on collateral, and perhaps limits on the geographical origin of the assets.

Such tweaks are more like methadone than the cold turkey that the financial markets need, though they are at least a start. If banking, though, is at heart a confidence trick -- which is what the events of the past 12 months suggest -- then maybe the smartest way for the central banks to restore that confidence is to show renewed faith in the financial community's ability to stand on its own by withdrawing their support.

(Mark Gilbert is a Bloomberg News columnist. The opinions expressed are his own.)

peterthe painter : alla italics an bolds an colors is mine man!

mo fro bloomberg -

U.S. Must Buy Assets to Prevent `Financial Tsunami,' Gross Says

....A process of ``delevering,'' where banks are shrinking and cutting off lending, is sapping demand for loans, bonds, stocks and commodities, driving down prices of assets of even ``impeccable quality,'' Gross said. The decline may continue until the government steps in as a buyer, he said.

``Unchecked, it can turn a campfire into a forest fire, a mild asset bear market into a destructive financial tsunami,'' Gross of Newport Beach, California-based Pacific Investment Management Co. said in commentary posted on the firm's Web site today. ``If we are to prevent a continuing asset and debt liquidation of near historic proportions, we will require policies that open up the balance sheet of the U.S. Treasury.''......

painterwhatever : this a real innerestin piece, yo should go there now an read the lot.

spider : so paintercroonerdude, whaddaya say...is they or is they aint bust man?

painterman : it don look good man, i guess some as is an some as aint but how many of each is not yet cleh. roub sez 2 trillion bucks gon up in smoke an only a quarter o that been owned up to.... on toppa at - as asset prices fall banksus capital shrink some mo!

bill gross : "...Assets are still being liquidated but there is an increasing reluctance on the part of the private market to risk any more of its own capital. Liquidity is drying up; risk appetites are anorexic; asset prices, despite a temporarily resurgent stock market, are mainly going down; now even oil and commodity prices are drowning. There may be a Jim Cramer bull market somewhere, but it’s primarily a mirage unless and until we get the entrance of new balance sheets, and a new source of liquidity willing to support asset prices."....

ninja : I don’t like Bill Gross at all....

....."Haha. With spreads blowing out, Billy has to be feeling some serious pain right now. What if he was wrong and the government doesn’t make his positions whole? What if they bail out Fannie and Freddie but give all investors one hell of a haircut?

Maybe his “investment secrets” were nothing more than, “hang out with the right crowd and make sure they’ve got your back” and “if all else fails, get the taxpayer to bail you out of your underwater positions.”

Well, Billy has a big bet on. The big bet could result in a big FAIL."

roub : "It is by now clear that the shopped-out, saving-less and debt-burdened US consumer is on the ropes and that there will be a significant and persistent contraction of real consumption for the next few quarters. About a dozen separate negative headwinds – to be described in detail in this note - are now hitting the US consumer while the positive effects on consumption of the tax rebates are already fading away.

spider : so lets see ifn i got this right... tax payers gon get stiffed to save the asses o the financial s but itz ok cos we all gon get stuffed if they all clapse? what mish say?

mish : Leverage Continues To Unwind...

..."Across the board, leverage continues to unwind. This is supportive of the idea that speculators played a bigger role in commodity prices than some have presumed. From a fundamental standpoint, the global economy is slowing at a rapid pace. Even China is rapidly slowing as noted in China's Manufacturing Contracts for Second Month.

Some attribute the China slowdown to shutting of factories ahead of the Olympics. I disagree. If a 2-3 week slowdown was all there was to the China slowdown story then the Chinese stock market would not have collapsed in half and China would not be announcing a stimulus package.

When it comes to hedge funds, I think the major shakeout is still coming. And as with Ospraie, those wanting out are going to find it easier said than done. Eventually illiquidity and leverage come back to haunt every time.".....

real interest rates are high

..."That overcapacity in conjunction with rising unemployment means that profits are going to be very difficult to come by. Indeed, there is no point to borrow money if expected returns are negative. Currently one cannot count on positive returns from the stock market, the corporate bond market, carry trades, housing, restaurants, nail salons, or even gold, silver, energy, and other commodities. Leverage is being forced out of the system at every turn.

Of course there are some Pollyannas who always think a massive recovery is just around the corners. However, banks are not acting as if a recovery is coming soon, nor is the treasury market, nor is the corporate bond market, nor are credit default swaps and various risk spreads.

Indeed the corporate bond market is acting as if it's Dead Banks Walking. And dead banks walking in my opinion is a continuation of the deflationary period we are in."

tim : The Financials Will Do the Rest

pickardthequaker : to be continued.......

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Yo! Spider dude, How come we gotta keep sayin this stuff about this is not advice blah blah?

spider :Painter dude thats so's the suckers out there won't go do nothin stupid and say we told em it was ok. Then they gon come get yo with some smart ass lawyer an sue yo skinny ass off!

pickard : No way man! Aint nobody dumb enuff to listen to some freakin artist view on investin they hard earned bucks?

spider : Way man, Sooo way! Them suckers'l listen to any kind o s**t if they think they can get a edge.
Just look at the way they piled inta real estate, CDO's SIV's, CDS's and whatever.

Shoot! What you say Halfcat?
It's cool! What the f**k kind a lawyer gonna sue a dog or a rat?
I'm a mouse! you mutt.
Chill guys, cool it, the suckers watchin an all.

LOW VOLUME

yo! (sotto voce) wassup? innit!

pickardthepainter : zzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzz

opkin : whahoppen musky?

spider : nuthin here, nuthin there, nuthin, nuthin everwhere....

zooney : lull befo a storm man......

gilligan : what fo i gotta be gilligan? i wan be elvis!

lavern : gil. shut the f**k up man.

beulah : where that freakin painter man? i gon kick he ass when i gets im. he so g*damm lazy he gon be asleep onna bridge.

halfcat : we gotta get outa dis place.......

granny-in-ireland : wen i grows up i gonna write the most boring blog inna world.......


Previously...on Dorktrek : Lost In Space...

The crew from the loft have fallen thru the back of a cornflakes box, in the breakfast nook of the loft, in downtown PALOOKAVILLE and onto the bridge of the United Flakes Starship Turnerprize, which has been hailed with a strange warning about trillions of dollars being sucked into a deleveraging black hole. On the way to investigate, the Turnerprize was caught up in the dreaded 'Flation - a nebula of the most disturbin kind.....read on at yo peril...

PALOOKAVILLE star date whatever+25.... Incomin messages...

.....seem like this damn nebla screwin round with evva thang in space. jus lookie heh atta footbol news.... arab dudes, wotz got alla dosh, is buyin up the footbol. seem like a long time since local dudes played fo they own side an workin stiffs gotta dosh ta see em.

Sulaiman Al-Fahim planning £133m January bid for Cristiano Ronaldo

nah days only da rich kin afford to go see em. an wotz more y'all rich teams owned by a rich dudes is buyin alla players wot can score!

i declare soon it gon be....."jus mail the cheque dudes"... put yo bid inna envelope anna biggest bung gets da cup!

mebbe it no bad ting .... jus think of all at dubbin wotz gon be saved!

yo jus cop a load a dis...

LOOKS LIKE gordon DARLING WOZ RIGHT!

evva body been beatin up on po ol darlin fo TELLIN THE TRUTH. but here be ammo fo is ballsy stand....

UK is the only major economy to face recession this year, OECD warns

The Bigger Picture

chart via Jake at EconomPic Data

basically what i am picking up here is the debate about US govt. statistics. you can see this @ jakes
and @ the big picture. The point is that the recent positive GDP figures are bollocks. The high cost of oil imports are inflating US GDP!

this looks more like it!

goodhart inna telegraph :-

Pencil in 2010 as the start of recovery from the recession

"How will the forthcoming recession compare with that of the early 1990s? The collapse in the housing market is likely to be just as bad, but for the rest there are pluses and minuses. On the plus side, we are getting some relief from a decline in the exchange rate at an earlier stage in the cycle than in the 1990s when we were hooked into the ERM, and both interest rates and inflation will (soon) be considerably less.

On the minus side, the credit crunch, and probably the world economy more widely, will be worse this time. The worst depressions result from financial collapses, so there remains a serious downside risk, but the most likely outcome is perhaps slightly less bad now than then."

so kaletski...say sorry to gordon DARLING. don shoot da messenger dude cos yo don lak de message. gordon BROWN be da bad guy...so have a pop where pop is due!

"core"!!!!!!!!....BLIMEY!

yo! innit dateline PALOOKAVILLE - labour day (innit!)

kaletski joins the mob attack on gordon DARLING

Crisis, what crisis? Alistair Darling’s just got his figures wrong

itz all ta do wi "core recession" yo know only stuff wot don matta get included.

like risin unemployment don count cos itz not risin enough!
fallin house prices don count cos they aint fell enough!
fallin manufactrin aint fallin enough!
price o sweat aint risin!
price o energy not risin !
price o food not risin!

kaletski sez DARLIN gottit wrong cos stuff not bad enough yet. sez like uk a great place an in great shape so wotza problem?

"The most obvious contrasts – today’s 5 per cent inflation and 5.4 per cent unemployment may feel uncomfortable, but these are just tiny ripples compared with the tidal waves of economic hardship – the 27 per cent inflation and 12 per cent unemployment – that hit Britain in the 1970s and 1980s."

guess wot? inna '70's when at stuff appnin - house prices goin through the roof!!!! price o sweat goin through the roof - I WOZ THERE MAN!! IN 1979 I GOTTA 16% pay rise!
in 1980 I gotta 21.5% pay rise!!! I ALSO GOT MADE REDUNDANT!!!

in 1978 I bought a house fo £11,000 added a garage fo £1,000 and sold house 2 yrears later for £22,000 in 1980!

HOUSE PRICES FALLIN MEGA FAST NOW!!!
UNEMPLOYMENT RISIN AND WILL RISE FASTER!!!
BANKS GOIN BUST OR MERGIN FAST!!!
GOVMENT BORRERD UP TO THE HILT - AN TAX revenues FALLIN!!!
from goodhart in telegraph -"The reality is that the fiscal deficit is already large, and is likely to blow out much further over the next year or two, especially as tax revenues from the golden geese in the City dry up. While energy companies present an obviously inviting target, we need them to invest much more, and higher taxation is not the best incentive for that."
COMPANIES MOVIN AWAY FROM UK COS OF HIGH TAXES AND EVER MORE NEW IDEAS FOR RAISIN EM!!!

cop fo dis...(kaletski)...

"What on earth, then, was Mr Darling talking about when he described the present economic crisis as the worst since 1948? The Treasury lamely suggested over the weekend that the Chancellor was not really referring to Britain, but to the world economy as a whole. This “clarification”, however, does not get Mr Darling off the hook. The US has not yet suffered a recession – much less the once in a lifetime depression predicted widely a few months ago – and only last Friday announced a stark upgrade in its GDP figures." wow what would mish say???

get this - unemployment only 5.4%

1. tell that to the unemployed!
2. the figures is fixed in that only people who qualify fo JOB SEEKERS ALLOWANCE are in the figures. not all the unemployed.
3. job seekers allowance be TIME LIMITED so you can come off it without finding a job!!!!
4. 1nn1 '70's you got your MORTGAGE INTEREST PAID. now you do not.
5. inna '70's you got unemployment benefit FOREVER and stayed onna figures fo good or until you got a job!!!

kaletski - is he workin fo the man? is he in sympathy with alla bullies? - wot kikkin DARLIN fo TELLIN THE TRUTH!!!

HOW MUCH FASTER ARE YOU IN THE SHIT TODAY THAN THEN?

y'all in denial, y'all runnin scared, y'all inna same scam, y'all supportin the GORDONS - bullies all.

more from the times -

Pound falls to two-year low on Darling blunder