YOU HAVE ONE NEW MISSED MESSAGE

yo!... virus callin... innit!

calls are cummin in..

ta unlock the lock down..

in palookaville..

nobody likes to..

spend time with..

the family..

their kids..

no one wants to breath..

the new fresh air..

listen to the new silence..

they are getting fed up..

of..

THE VIRUS GAMES

simple cyrus says..

put your hands in the air..

an shake them all about..

this will make my message spread..

especially when you shout..

WE CAME HERE TO PLAY

we've also come to stay..

NEW COVID 20 

if you wish..

ta end the games..

you will have to..

do what you have so far..

disasterously refused to do..

prepare.. prepare..prepare..

test.. test.. test..

trace.. trace.. trace..

quarantine seriously..

not by self..

pay sick pay..

stop travelling..

masks and visors for all..


FORTY SHADES OF GREEN


In Ireland, we consume a great deal of British media.

This means that we’ve been watching..

with growing despair and grief..

 British news reports chronicling a national disaster..

But for weeks now, long before the death rate accelerated..

we’ve been watching and reading your reports with a queasy feeling..

We knew of the measures and plans the Irish government was putting in place to protect us..

and we knew how far..

your government was slipping behind.

When our taoiseach was..

closing our schools and universities,

your prime minister was still telling you to wash your hands..

When our government cancelled St Patrick’s Day celebrations..

 yours allowed the Cheltenham Festival to go ahead..

a potentially massive multi-day super-spreading event of over 250,000 people..

 The contrast was disorientating..

Nowhere was the dissonance more marked than on the weekend before St Patrick’s day..

By that point..

Ireland had banned indoor gatherings of more than 100 people..

but had stopped short of closing the pubs..

A video showing revellers in Temple Bar went viral..

a public outcry ensued; #closethepubs trended on Irish Twitter..

the minister for health commented..

and voluntary pub closures..

began the following morning..


I DRANK IN PETEY LAWLER'S WHILE BILLY STUART SANG

Alone all alone by the wave-washed strand
And alone in a crowded hall

 
The hall it is gay and the waves they are grand
But my heart is not here at all
It flies far away by night and by day

 To the times and the joys that are gone
But I never will forget the sweet maiden I met
In the valley near Slieve Na Mban

coming up..

NEW COVID 21

LAME DUCK PRESIDENT

STATE OF THE UNION

THREE STRIKES AND YOU'RE OUT

A WHOLE WASHDAY SHOT TO HELL

yo!... race against virus...innit!

and I can't find my way home..

in palookaville..

at the end of term..

a pack of students had hidden a bottle..

of dom perignom..

over the border..

before lock down..

TIME TO GO BACK WAS BEFORE

now they cannot get there..

to celebrate..

unless all student loans..

are jubileed

and even then..

they cannot fly there..

the border is closed

IT'S THE WALL.. IN REVERSE

those pesky mex..

gone dun..

shutta border..

ta keep us sick palookas out..

time was they was rushin here..

ta git work and git rich..

nah they ain't no work..

probably soon us dudes..

goin there fo work..

THE CARTEL

crime levels..

level down..

folks stay home..

no time now fo snow..

ALL TOMORROWS AGENCIES

will have nothin ta do..

no one ta lock up..

an all them as is..

locked up..

either be released..

or..

dead

MEANWHILE

back at the ranch..

dude cowboys, golf widows..

and..

electric mops..

are flying out the airplane..

without a parachute..

FANDANGO

Don't get sick, man. l can't land with you like that..

Sorry, dude

A whole washday shot to hell

Wow, what a bummer 

coming next..

on..

VIRUS TREK

which number will be the highest..

unemployed or dead?

who to blame?

where is the vaccine?

how to get out of the economic black hole..

It ain’t over till it’s over.

BLACK HOLE ECONOMICS

yo!... star trekkin... innit!

the uss enterprise...

the palookaville starship...

is in a black hole...

IT'S ONLY THE NEBULA STUPID

admiral donald t kirk...

has hit the hole in one...

can the FEDS...

save the day?

THE GOLD STANDARD

admiral nixon...

has taken all the gold on board...

the uss fort knox...

whilst admiral brown...

has swapped our gold...

for paper euros

KLINGONS ONNA STARBOARD BOW

since the trade wars...

the klingons are calling names...

and won't share sweets...

admiral donald t kirk...

has ordered PPE...

it's on order..

but..

is it here?

STAND OFF IN PALOOKAVILLE

lost in space...

and with nothing to do...

the crew are getting restless...

voices are calling for a range of options...

re-start the economy...

print more money...

give the crew a rise...

the crew just want a holiday...

whilst the admiral just...

wants to play golf...

THE HOSPITAL SHIP

uss new york...

is under attack from the virus...

captain cuomo...

has called for a federation effort...

an all out attack...

led by admiral donald t kirk...

and paid for..

by printing dollars

 unfortunately...

the hospital ship is sinking...

from the weight...

of unemployed crew..

taking up space...

PAPER WINGS

it's worse than that...

they're dead don...

"where the hell's the vaccine"... 

"light years away"...

TAKE BACK CONTROL

the virus can not be controlled...

so we must control the crew...

no holidays and no sick pay...

no jobs...

an only paper money

THE WAY TO THE SARS

out here in space...

there should be room for all of us..

to distance ourselves from...

our mistakes...

but

THIS SPACE AIN'T BIG ENOUGH FOR THE BOTH OF US

whether you believe...

in sound money...

the gold standard...

or just like to print...

navigating in space is difficult...

it's bad enough...

having to steer a course...

around all the bastards...

out here...

without this deadly virus...

We made too many wrong mistakes.

and...

A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore. 

and...

Slump? I ain’t in no slump… 

I just ain’t hitting.

COMPUTERS AIN'T WHAT THEY USED TA BE

HAL 9000

 I've just picked up a fault in the AE35 unit...

It's going to go 100% failure in 72 hours

I am putting myself to the fullest possible use...

which is all I think that any conscious entity...

can ever hope to do

 HAL 9000

I'm afraid...

Dave Bowman..

Don't be. We'll be together...

HAL 9000..

Where will we be?

Dave Bowman..

Where I am now 

DON'T TEST DON'T TELL 

You’ve got to be very careful...

if you don’t know where you are going because...

you might not get there.

EVERY BODY KNOWS THIS IS NOWHERE

admiral..

donald t kirk..

of the starship..

enterprise..

is stuck in a hole in space

he didn't aim to get there..

he just wasn't listening to his officers..

now his face is..

on screen..

all day..

every day..

talking to keep his..

spirits up..

waiting for the vaccine.. 

to arrive..

thru..

the wormhole..

at..

warp speed!

so

PAPER MONEY VERSUS GOLD

unemployment goin thru a roof..

no more enterprise..

big bazookas firin evva more paper..

DIVIDED WE FALL

jus when a wurl..

needa helpin hand..

political parties..

are divided

it's probably nothing really..

just about who gets the pork..

and the bailouts..

COMING NEXT 

can uss enterprise print it's way out of this black hole?

will klingons come to the table?

what will gold do?

how many will die..

from the virus..

when will there be a vaccine..

will anyone evva fly again..

will we carry on cruising..

will the world ever be the same again..

whose to blame?

what are the real numbers?

who profits?

where is the all this money going?

A LAST WORD FROM HAL

Are you sure you're making the right decision? 

I think we should stop.

 

 

BIG YELLOW VIRUS

yo!... don't know what you've got - til it's gone!... innit!

us folks here in palookaville...

used ta lak a looka rounda shops...

getta bite ta eat...

get a beer...

clubbin...

jumpi an jivin...

doin stuff...

whatevva

6.66 MILLION JOBLESS CLAIMS

now there is no more mornin dew...

the parking lot is empty...

or it's a homeless shelter...

BOTTOM FALLS OUT OF THE TOP

how did this happen?

slowly at first...

then suddenly

if only we had known...

what exponential growth meant...

how what was no big deal...

became a FGBD

 WHERE WERE THE BIG PALOOKAS AT IN JANUARY  2020

WATCH : CHRIS MARTENSON 

24 January 2020

WHAT CANNOT BE CURED

must be endured

Late last night
I heard the screen door slam
And a big yellow virus
Took away my old man

Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you've got
Till it's gone

They paved paradise
And put up a hospital tent